I'm a Chicken Hawk and I eat Chickens!

Tuesday evening, around 8pm, Hawk goes down to the basement for some laundry related task. He yells up the stairs at me that �something around the freezer smells funny. Come down and smell it�

Now, I have to tell you,I have had more attractive invitations from the man in my day AND I am watching the ballgame and don�t really want to be bothered with noxious odors.

But the truth is, the game is in a rain delay and he probably knows this, so I head downstairs and discover Hawk poking his fingers into mountains of soggy, dripping, defrosting meat. A carelessly tossed wet towel has dislodged the freezer plug from his socket.

I won�t mention any names, but Missy needs to be more careful.

Now the rule of thumb on freezer failure is that if the food still is crunchy with ice crystals, you can refreeze it. But if it�s 100% defrosted, toss it or cook it.

The turkey, a brisket and all of the Tribal issued buffalo are ok, but about 15 chickens are totaly defrosted.

Hawk grew up poor and when he says that a lot of times he didn�t have enough to eat, I believe him. I believe him because he eats like he is making up for lost time. The man can pack it away like an NFL linebacker and never gain an ounce. Seriously, at any given meal, he eats twice as much as me and I am the one that is always fretting over bikini season and counting fat grams.

The point is, he is not about to throw $50 bucks worth of chicken away. He grabs a laundry basket and starts loading it up with dripping chickens.

Many, many chickens, we have more freakin�chickens than the Colonel.

Ok, Imagine a FogHorn Leghorn voice now: �I say, I say Boy? What you gonna do with all them chickens?� I ask, like an idiot. He starts squawking like Henery Hawk about Salmonella. He's going to cook them, of course.

Tonight.

And he does; He bakes a few, he broils a few. Some go out to the BBQ grill; he fries a couple and even boils them up �for chicken salad�

I go back to the ballgame. The rain is over. Royals are playing the D�Backs who really aren�t much of a threat with Randy Johnson and Curt Schilling on the disabled list. The house is filling up with the delicious smell of garlic, lemon and roast chicken. Hawk is running back and forth like Emeril on speed, flipping, frying and fricasseeing. He has gone on-line looking for new recipes for tetrazinni.

Sometime after 11pm, your Royals beat the Snakes more decisively than St Patrick. Hawk has chicken dinners prepared for the next month and is making a list of who we can invite over.

Anyone want a drumstick?

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